I thought I would start by saying a bit about Humanism generally and then go on to talk a bit about my own experience.

Humanism is not a religion. It is more an ethical philosophy of life. There is no dogma, no holy book, no laid down list of what to believe or what to do. Of course, we do take notice of what thinkers have said - but it is a very democratic approach to life, where everyone can have an input.

We believe there is no supernatural element in the universe, nothing that is beyond the earthly and the human. This means we do not believe in a deity. There is no being controlling our lives, or watching over us. Some may find this liberating, others may find it scary that we are on our own in the universe. Personally this realisation has brought me much inner peace.

Humanists are agnostics or atheists. Agnostics believe it is impossible to know whether there is a god or gods whereas atheists believe that god or gods do not exist.

Humanists do not believe in an after life -- or a before life. This is the only life we have and we should make the most of it for all of us. We believe the body decays - that without our brain cells our personality disappears. We become a part of the cosmos as our cells dissipate into the universe. We hold humanist funerals -- where the emphasis is on the life that has been lived and the need for mutual support for the bereaved.

Humanists believe in moral values – most of which are shared with religious people. The need for values comes from the fact that we live in society, that we are social beings. One guide we use is the Golden Rule -- treat others as you would like to be treated yourself -- or put it the other way round -- do not do to others what you would not like them to do to you. Another guide is to consider the consequences of our actions. Humanists take into account evidence and experience and any new information which comes along.

Personally, I believe my conscience comes from within me because I don’t want to feel bad about myself and like everyone else I want to get along with people. I believe this is a natural instinct which comes out of evolution by natural selection. I also enjoy being free from any rules set hundreds of years ago but of course that doesn’t stop me agreeing with them if they are right for today.

Humanists acknowledge that for some people life can be very difficult, but we believe in the attempt to create fulfilled and and happy lives for all , whether on a social or a personal level.

I’ve been an atheist in Surrey for more than 30 years. Although I was only aware of Humanism 12 years ago, I, like many others, was already living my life as a Humanist, I just hadn’t realised it.

Like other people, being true to my core beliefs is an overwhelming need – thus, when years ago my only options were getting married in a registry office or a church I chose the registry office much to my Uncle’s strong disapproval. Similarly of course I couldn’t christen my children but that didn’t stop me having a welcoming gathering of friends and family with a speech and cutting a cake. Now I know that I could go to the British Humanist Association for support with Humanist ceremonies for baby namings and weddings as well as for funerals.

Like everyone I have tried to bring up my children to have high moral values. I have also said from a very early age that it is entirely up to them whether they believe in a god or gods and whether they want to follow a religion or not. Their thoughts on this sadly were tested at the ages of 4 and 6 when their Dad died and I had to explain to them where he was now. So I said that I didn’t know. I said different people think different things, their Granny thought he would be in heaven whereas I thought you don’t go anywhere when you die but he would always be there for us in our thoughts. That we would always know he loved us and hadn’t wanted to leave us.

I believe strongly in Religious Education and the youth SACRE have confirmed the wonderful appetite for young people to learn about each other and each other’s beliefs. Whereas we can achieve much in RE, in my view there is simply no substitute for being in the same class as children from different backgrounds to realise that we all have so much more in common than what divides us. Thus as a Humanist, like many religious people, I am against Faith Schools.

As a Humanist I also find compulsory religious worship in school quite difficult. I don’t know if anybody else remembers but one of our youth SACRE a few years back said how sorry they felt for people with a different religion during the Christian worship part of assembly. It is no good saying withdraw your child from assembly as this is such an important part of school life, when moral values are highlighted and the school is encouraged to feel as one family with the benefits and responsibilities that go along with this.

Out of the blue when my son was 6 I found him crying at home and I asked him what the matter was. He replied he was being told off for not singing hymns in assembly. When I asked why he wasn’t singing he said that he didn’t believe that Jesus loved him and he didn’t believe in God. The headteacher said he had to sing as the other children might follow suit. Of course my son had had to cope with questions from losing his Dad that thankfully most children don’t have to. In the end the headteacher phoned Surrey RE department and my son was given dispensation not to sing.

As a Humanist I really appreciate it when a religious person instead of saying let us pray, says something like let us take a moment of silence for prayer or reflection. It is so good to feel included. I really appreciated Obama’s inclusion of non-believers in his inaugral address.

Due to my ignorance, an area where I was surprised that being a Humanist can cause problems is Scouts. My daughter was fine when she joined Explorer Scouts as she believed in God. The first I was aware of any issue was when my son who was going to Beaver Scouts said he didn’t know what to do as he had to make a promise to God. I said he had to explain his difficulty to his leader which he did. His leader asked him – well what promise could you make instead. Robert replied to Nature and this is what he promised. As I now know, the leader took quite a risk as London HQ say you have to believe in God to be a scout with the single exception that you are allowed to be a scout if you are Buddhist and in that case you can make your promise to Dharma.

Some Humanists join local groups. In Surrey for example we have groups in Guildford, Reigate, Richmond and Farnham. We come together to enjoy discussions, hear talks, and have social events and of course friendships and mutual support follow from this. However a lot of Humanists find that they don’t need to join a group.

Farnham Humanists for example are supporting the provision of Humanist chaplains. When in difficulty and removed from their everyday social context, people like to have contact with those who share their outlook on life and to know they are not alone. We believe that a hospital patient or a prisoner who holds Humanist views will appreciate contact with another Humanist as chaplain, in just the same way that a Christian appreciates the presence of a Christian chaplain.

Finally, a question we are often asked is what do we do about Christmas? We celebrate Christmas as a wonderful opportunity for family and friends to get together. It provides a focus for getting through the winter to the point of when the days start getting longer and we all have the hope of Spring being on its way.